Issue 198, page 5

Search Home FAQ Links Site map Book Store

BackIssues

New Ask Us Theory About
Laughing Stock

The ANNUAL NEOLOGISM CONTEST 

Once again, The Washington Post has published the winning submissions to its yearly contest, in which readers are asked to supply alternate meanings for common words.

1. Coffee (n.), the person upon whom one coughs.

2. Flabbergasted (adj.), appalled over how much weight you have gained.

3. Abdicate (v.), to give up all hope of ever having a flat stomach.

4. Esplanade (v.), to attempt an explanation while drunk.

5. Willy-nilly (adj.), impotent.

6. Negligent (adj.), describes a condition in which you absentmindedly answer the door in your nightgown.

7. Lymph (v.), to walk with a lisp.

8. Gargoyle (n.), olive-flavored mouthwash.

9. Flatulence (n.) emergency vehicle that picks you up after you are run over by a steamroller.

10. Balderdash (n.), a rapidly receding hairline.

11. Testicle (n.), a humorous question on an exam.

12. Rectitude (n.), the formal, dignified demeanor adopted by proctologists.

13. Pokemon (n), a Rastafarian proctologist.

14. Oyster (n.), a person who sprinkles his conversation with Yiddishisms.

15. Frisbeetarianism (n.), The belief that, when you die, your Soul flies up onto the roof and gets stuck there.

16. Circumvent (n.), an opening in the front of boxer shorts worn by Jewish men.

We are short on Laughing Stock material.  Send us your e-mail, clipping or photograph (via e-mail or snail mail).  If we use it in Laughing Stock, you will receive a $10 gift certificate from Amazon.com!  Ken O sent in this week's winner.  Thanks Ken!

Give a little to help keep TOWFI (and the prizes!) going.  Click the Paypal button below.

Do you enjoy reading Take Our Word For It?  Then help us keep it going.  It's easy to donate, and you can pay via credit card.  Just click the button.  

PREVIOUS  | ETYMOLOGY BOOKSTORE | HOME

Comments, additions? Send to Melanie & Mike: melmike@takeourword.com
DO NOT SEND QUERIES TO THAT ADDRESS.  Instead, ASK US.
Copyright © 1995-
2005 TIERE
Last Updated 02/14/05 09:44 PM